Wear your positivity, and walk around just like you own it!

When I was little, my parents weren’t rich, but they worked hard and provided for us. For example, they would always ensure that we had new clothes for school and a suit to wear to Sunday school and church. I remember whenever they bought me a new suit. I always felt insecure and inadequate, but when I put that suit on, like Lil Nas X says, “Can’t nobody could tell me nothing!” I walked around with a limp, a pep in my step, and leaned so hard people thought my ankle was sprained, and my back was broken. Everyone might’ve laughed at me, (especially my uncle!) but I didn’t care because I owned the world when I wore that suit. I felt good and had a positive attitude whenever I wore that suit.

We all need to wear a positive attitude like I wore that suit. Even though I was short, I felt bigger and taller wearing that suit. We should let our attitude amplify our belief in ourselves. If we feel good, do good, and help others, we can grow bigger and feel broader than our circumstances.

The real test is: when the attitude suit is at the cleaners, can we have a good attitude amid adversity? 

Can we remain positive and hopeful? 

Can we accept negative situations with grace when the suit is dirty, and the world is crashing down

around us? 

It’s not easy, but one thing is true: The world can’t control our attitude, but our attitude can rule the world. 

The only thing that we can truly own is our attitude. This blog is not about having a boastful and boisterous attitude. Instead, this blog is about the importance of having a good attitude, being positive, and staying hopeful. 

Use your memory and remember to make your add-itude a positive number

I admit, that staying positive isn’t easy. It’s something that I have to remind myself of each day. One way I do that is with numbers. In arithmetic, there are positive integers and negative integers. The more positive digits you have over zero, the higher the value of the number. The lower the digit below zero, the lower the value of the number. Think of integers like thoughts. The sum of our memories and all we do each day starts with our thoughts. You have to choose a positive thought over a negative thought. The more positive thoughts, the higher the attitude. The more negative thoughts you have, the lower your attitude will be. Therefore, if positivity is present, negativity will be absent. Just like math, subtract your negative experiences and add good thoughts to multiply the happiness in your life. I have a tie pin that I received for Father’s Day one year. On the back, it says, “Love is the tie that binds.” Love is the tie that binds us all together. You can’t give love, receive love, or share love while being negative. Saying I love you with a scowl, rolling your eyes, or with an angry face won’t be received well. That’s why love is congruent with positivity. Share love with positive thoughts, words, and actions. Do everything that you do with a positive attitude.

You might think, “That sounds great Lionel, but I’m just trying to do my best, but some people are discouraging, instead of encouraging. I eat my hope loaf, and chew with a good attitude, but I feel like everyone around me eats “Hater-tots and drinks Hater-ade!” 

If that’s the case, then make your own food your own way. For example, you can bake your pie with a positive attitude. You can start by rolling the crust with laughter. Then, placing the crust in a pan with Joy. Next, filling the pie with memories and bake the pie in your heart. Then while the pie is baking, you can smell the decadent thoughts of love throughout your kitchen of life. Oh, how sweet is the smell of positivity!

Try not to get infected with the negativity disease

In the book, I.N.S.P.I.R.E., I describe when I had to be rushed to the hospital. A week prior, I had surgery. During the course of that week, something went wrong at the site of my procedure. The site of my surgical procedure had become infected. There are some places in the body where bacteria are supposed to reside. It’s normal for bacteria to live on the surface of the skin, the mouth, and the intestines. However, there are other places like the bloodstream, tissues, and organs where bacteria shouldn’t be. When bacteria spreads to these different regions, the bacteria will cause an infection. If that infection isn’t stopped, it can cause a life-threatening condition called Sepsis. Internally, I became infected with bacteria and as a young Laboratory technician, I quickly realized that was happening inside my body. 

The truth is, that negativity is like a disease. You will continue to find people who are negative, spiteful, and envious of your life. They are infected with negativity. Because of their infection, they’re not happy. When you’re not happy, you’re miserable. Oftentimes, misery loves company. Because they’re miserable, and you’re not, they might be jealous or unhappy and don’t want you to be happy. Either way, they are nay-sayers, and I ask you to stand up and firm when you’re around them. Those people will try to do whatever they can to slow you down when they see how good you are. Don’t let them infect you with their negativity. It will only make you sick. Stay strong, be well, and don’t let their negative sicknesses infect you. Positivity will ensure you won’t get admitted into the negativity ward. 

Chase Tucker, is a personal trainer, lifestyle coach, and consultant to CEOs. Chase previously served as one of the Peloton instructors. With a great attitude and a background in Physical Therapy, Coach Chase would lead strenuous workouts to challenge our mind and body, and then he would end the workout with positive affirmations during the stretch. Through word and deed, Chase has proven to be one of the most positive people I have seen. Because he is so positive, I follow him on Instagram. In one of his recent posts, Chase describes a “lack of ease” when he’s not feeling his best. This lack of ease is literally “dis-ease,” and if he continues to operate from that place, then it will slowly spread like a virus until he has the disease mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually.

Chase and I agree that negativity is like a disease. Negativity, a lack of ease, and stress can cause conflict and degrade our health. But, then, it doesn’t stop there. That same negativity can spread and similarly impact an organization, a sports team, or even a neighborhood. Negative people may not like you. They might be jealous of you, and that’s ok. Just don’t let them change you. Be the beautiful, intelligent, funny, and strong person that you are. Be you and stay true to yourself. 

If you fall down, in a mud puddle of negativity, get up!

You should also be aware that people around you will be upset as they sit in their mud puddle of negativity. Some people accidentally fall into the mud, stand up, brush their shoulders off, and clean themselves up. These are positive people doing what positive people do. Negative people stay down in the mud and provide excuse after excuse. “I can’t get up! It’s too hard! It’s too much trouble!” They slip, slide, and fall back down when they try to stand up. Because negativity is a slippery slope, it’s too hard to stand back up. Instead, they start getting comfortable and making a home right there in the mud. These negative people sling mud on everyone else, hoping to make them dirty too. Misery loves company. When these negative thoughts grow beyond mere cognizance, they cause problems. Negativity can be paralyzing, cause us to worry, and create anxiety and fear. Do yourself a favor. When negativity knocks, don’t answer the door.

Like good food, life can be messy too!

Life can be like going to a nice restaurant, wearing a white shirt, and ordering spaghetti. When we find ourselves in the restaurant of life, it’s alright to eat. But, if we aren’t careful, we might get that negativity all over us. Then that mess of negativity will cause conflict and even degrade our health. After that, if we don’t clean it off, we’ll get similar stains on our organization, classmates, school, sports team, or neighborhood. Sometimes, like good food, life can be messy too. But, when we get it on us, we must clean it off as fast as possible. When this happens, we should clean ourselves up with positivity. One way of doing this is by surrounding ourselves with people we love. Often that circle of people is small, and that’s alright. Here’s food for thought: It’s all about portion control, right? It’s quality over quantity. Wipe off the stains of negativity by surrounding yourself with people who love us back and people who pick us up and keep us moving. 

When negativity knocks, don’t answer the door.

One day, there was a knock at my door. I didn’t know who it was, so I took a peek to see who it was. On the other side of the door was a young man. The man, most of the time, was very nice. The problem was, that he let everything affect him. He let things affect his thoughts, affect his actions, and affect the words that he spoke. For example, when it rained, he said, “It’s raining! Oh, no! It will probably flood the basement.” When the weather was nice, he said, “It’s so hot outside! The heat is unbearable!” Instead of enjoying how it felt when he sat in a comfortable chair, he said, “This chair is too soft; I feel like I’m sinking to the floor!” I wanted to answer the door because he was a our neighbor. Most of the time, he was friendly and tried to help when he could; but often, he was just negative. I was honest with him, and tried to uplift him and give him good advice. He agreed and listened, but his habits were so ingrained that he often fell into the same negativity trapdoor. He was fine while I guided him, but when I wasn’t there before I could say, “Be careful,” he fell through the negativity trap door again and into the black hole of sadness. Once he fell in, it took a while to help him out. I remembered what happened the last time that I answered the door, let him in, and he did the same routine. He taught me a lesson, and I told him to make a promise. I said, "The next time you stop by, if you start talking negative, you'll need to leave. I don't like hearing you say bad things about yourself, and I would rather see you happy than sad. I believe in you, I want the best for you, and I think that you are a great person. But, I'm a positive person. When negativity knocks, I don't want to answer the door." Every time after that, he made sure to speak about himself in a good way, and had a better outlook on his life. Months later, I told him that he smiled and laughed more. He acknowledged it and agreed that his attitude shift, changed his life and made him feel better thaan ever before. Then he said, "When negativity knocks, man, I don't even answer the door!" We laughed and he talked about how much his new positive attitude changed his life.

A few weeks ago, my wife said something profound. She said, “We can’t wait for life to stop being hard to start being happy.” That’s so true. When things aren’t going well, we need to turn our upside-down life right-side-up and do it with a smile. We need to look a round and look at the problem square in the face, and smile! 

My prayer is for you to smile. 

Right now. 

Don’t wait.

Don’t delay. 

Don’t make an excuse. 

Just smile. 

Why?

Because you were uniquely created and creatively designed by a God who doesn’t make mistakes. You were not born by accident. In the history of existence, since the beginning of time, there has never been another you. And guess what? From now until the end of the world, there will never be another you. You are the only you there ever has been, and that ever will be. You were deliberately created, and your life was intentionally designed. That, right there, is worth smiling about! 

If you just smiled, thank you for answering my prayer. And, if you keep reading, I’ll keep writing. 

So until next time-

Wishing you grace and peace,

Lionel Quartus Lowery II